Executor Road: Out! They Say…

Executor Road

Executor Road: Out! They Say…

Out! They Say!

Dealing with the friends watching you dealing with it…

A well-meaning friend said innocuously, “Out!” after I noted I had been busy going through the contents of our family house: the boxes, papers, tchotchkes, etc.  The stuff from the drawers, the darkest attic corners, the decaying archives, the piles.

I shuddered.   Then I remembered both of his parents are still with us, I exhaled and laughed.  His intentions were in the right place.

“Yeah”, I lied.

There’s a fair bit of survival navigating these encounters as you walk around dragging your heart on the ground.

When I say boxes or piles, I might note my mother saved everything.  Understanding there might be some recoil upon hearing this from the “throw it all out set”, I say, “Oh well”.  As to if this response obscures some insidious attachment disorder or some such I say, “absodamnlutely.”  I’ll go on.  Let me at those boxes.

We will concede that the boxes that my father got from Worman’s Liquor store in 60’s may need to be replaced.

Holy Crow (not the real word).  This is going to take a long time.”

Plan shift… this is not a box-by-box adventure.  This is a grazing over.  This is survival.  Create a manageable pile, or piles.  Move forward.

– Stuff I can handle now.
– Stuff I can put away for a while.

Cleanout Aid Stickers
These basic stickers may help organize

In other words…

  1. Look for the good stuff. That’s pile 1.
  2. Look for the stuff we can throw/recycle.  Pile 2.
  3. Turn two boxes into one as you go.
  4. Save it for a later pile. Pile 3.

Pile 3 may be somewhat problematic.  Maybe later never comes?

People will line up to tell you “You’re never going to go through that stuff.”

So what?

Some people can do it, toss it all, with impunity.  That’s not me.  In my world, “Stuff matters”.  So that’s at the heart of this – you do you, let them do them.  If the stuff matters to you, embrace it and don’t look back.  Be realistic about any space constraints, but don’t try to fit into anyone’s expectations or judgments.

Executors have a lot on their plate.  One rule of survival is “prioritize”. If dealing with personal property this way buys you a little time now, and helps you move forward, do it.


Thanks for reading.


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